I can’t help but think of Alice in Wonderland—the Disney movie…and the caterpillar with the hookah…asking Alice this question while blowing smokey designs in her face.
No smoke here…but the question remains the same.
Who ARE YOU?
What are you here to do?
What’s your gift?
No, I’m not talking about something you got for a birthday or holiday—if you celebrate those.
I’m talking about something that’s special about YOU…something that you were BORN with—that no one else can do just like you.
I’m not talking about a skill like playing an music instrument.
I’m not talking about talents either…but gifts.
But what’s the difference, you ask? That’s what today’s guest on Planet Noun is discussing in this episode. Fredrick Bussey also wrote a book about it.
So let’s get right into it…he’s a dad…a speaker and entrepreneur…founder of marketing and branding consultancy IconStatus…his work? Helping brands and individuals to convey their stories with more power.
More from Fredrick Bussey author of the book “Breaking Orbit: Rip Out of the Regular by Unearthing the Power Within” on Planet Noun.
Learn more about Bussey via his social media platforms such as Facebook and Instagram:
It’s always exciting when a new episode drops…this one is no exception. It’s the second of two collaboration episodes with Liliana and Tamara of Barely Bougie Mamas—a podcast that was released during the summer.
If you haven’t heard last week’s episode, take a listen after you get through with this one.
So Barely Bougie Mamas is a podcast featuring Liliana and Tamara—two moms who grew up in poverty—but have crafted lives for themselves and their kids that are totally different from their own upbringings…and all of the funnies and concerns that stem from those differences.
My sister Lea and I joined them at Liliana’s home in Southern California for some kiki-ing and questions.
Last week, we talked about some of their experiences growing up vs. how their kids are growing up.
And this week, Liliana, Tamara, My sister Lea and I talk about something Le-Le and I know…being single, childless aunties….And the role all aunties play in the family fabric. Whether they’re linked by bloodlines or play aunties that are for real-real with their care, concern and involvement.
So let’s get to it with the Barely Bougie Mamas and Planet Noun:
Topics and timecodes:
03:13—Dealing with annoying comments like “You’re not married? You don’t have kids? And you’re HAPPY?” (Answer: Hell to the yes! Contented, single and childless women do exist, they’re real people)
08:55—Aunties to O.P.K.-Other People’s Kids
10:19—The Sister-in-Law Co-Parent (Tamara says don’t skip your visitations) & the Auntie Posse
14:15—Unmarried Aunties, do you realize your importance (and not just for babysitting)?
17:30—Liliana’s experience as a single, childless auntie
21:28—The fun auntie
29:32—An auntie’s listening ear
35:05—Forging the relationship with a potential auntie in your life
If this is the first time you’ve heard of them, they have several episodes already released…12 of them…13 including this one.
I’m always excited when a new episode comes out…this one is no exception. It’s one of two back-to-back collaboration episodes we’re dropping today and next Thursday. Planet Noun’s first collaboration ever—and it’s with Liliana and Tamara of Barely Bougie Mamas—a podcast that was released during the summer..
A capsule-sized explanation of their show—it’s about two moms who grew up in poverty—but have crafted lives for themselves and their kids that are totally different from their own upbringings…and all of the funnies and concerns that stem from those differences.
My sister Lea and I joined them at Liliana’s home in Southern California for some ki-ki-ing and questions.
A little background…Tamara and I met the afternoon this was recorded…But she’s listened to some Planet Noun episodes, and I’ve listened to Barely Bougie Mamas shows.
Liliana and I grew up together. My sis and I have known her for years. Matter of fact, we go so far back, I don’t remember WHEN we met. My mom says it was at church when we were wee children who were sat in the class for babies, toddlers and under fivers. We used to sit next to each other and suck our thumbs, mom said.
That’s enough intro! There’s cussing in this episode. You’ve been warned…now listen in!
1:32 — How Tamara and Liliana met, then learned they had things in common
20:22—Dealing with bullies
21:03—Snitching then and now
41:55—Whose kids are more bougie? Tear-jerking experiences with their children
51:13—What to expect from Barely Bougie Mamas podcast
If this is the first time you’ve heard of them, they have several episodes already released…12 of them…13 including this one.
Listen to Liliana and Tamara, the Barely Bougie Mamas, on Anchor FM
Sometimes romantic relationships SUCK. Especially when they run off the rails…whether it be from growing differences between relatants or if someone just up and decides they don’t want you anymore, but they don’t bother to tell you about it.
Basically—when someone ghosts you.
Today’s guest experienced ghosting…she was the ghostee—if you will. Old boy turned her loose, but didn’t verbally communicate that to her—and wouldn’t communicate with her as she tried to get to the bottom of things.
So Lenina Mortimer wrote a book about it—to help someone else along the ghastly breakup recovery path.
Take a listen to Lenina Mortimer, author of the book “I Ain’t Thinking About You…The 8 Step Guide to Finally Letting Him Go Using the Breakup Funeral Method.”
Let’s get this mourning in motion…On Planet Noun.
1:50—Getting the un-holy ghost(ting)
3:09—Discovering the root of dysfunctional relationships
6:24—Creating the Breakup Funeral
14:51—Timing: When is it best to hold a breakup funeral?
19:20—Why separation is healthy after a breakup/Why the Breakup Funeral is a communal experience
25:54—Running into the ghosted
30:09—A love letter to black women
35:32—Self-care is crucial to breakup recovery
38:50—Steering clear of breakup traps
41:31—To forgive or not to forgive?And when?
Get your e-book copy
Find out more about Lenina Mortimer and her work! Let’s start with a link to her e-book “I Ain’t Thinking About You…The 8 Step Guide to Finally Letting Him Go Using the Breakup Funeral Method.”
Lenina’s also on social media. You can learn more about her coaching services there. Facebook Instagram
When you know what you do best, sticking to your guns—as singer-songwriter PJ Morton writes and sings—is how to get your life’s work done.
Today’s podcast guest is N’Namdi Olufemi Bryant, a singer-songwriter and host of the podcast “For the Love of A Cappella.” We get into some themes of his latest album during this episode. It’s titled “If We Could Only Talk.”
So N’Namdi and I had been talking about doing a podcast together for MONTHS, but as usual, life takes on its own plans. We were going to have him on before an album release earlier this year, then tech difficulties took over his project.
But the idea was still in both of our orbits. So—lookie here—I saw on Instagram that N’Namdi was in Washington, D.C. I said to myself—GIRL…..let’s make this happen! If you don’t ask him if he’ll have time for an interview—it’s an automatic no!
I asked if he had an time to chat. He said yes, and here it is! It all worked out.
So we met up at the Mansion on O Street. It’s a tourist destination located just off the bustling Dupont Circle, and has a fascinating trove of history tied to it. It’s also where N’Namdi sometimes performs.
There are so many themes to this podcast, and to preserve the integrity of the conversation flow, I tried not to do too much lifting and pasting of interview parts. We talk about negative self-talk, and what N’Namdi does to overcome that hurdle. Also—a discussion on imperfection and about the different ways he stretched his vocal range.
During our talk I learned some things I didn’t know in the decades since we last saw each other.
So let’s get right to the conversation, where we start talking about his podcast “For the Love of A Capella,”and where he got the idea for his program.
07:55-Why it took him more than 10 years to complete one particular song arrangement
11:05—The makings and stories behind his current project “If We Could Only Talk”
21:30—How Kermit the Frog came up in our conversation
26:06—The road to vocal range
31:51—The time we talked about skylines and smog
33:39—Homeless in Huntsville, Ala. and Nashville
49:59—The part about albums, hilarious singing telegram and touching ride-share driver stories
That was N’Namdi Bryant…singer, songwriter, musical arranger…lover of a cappella! His new project “If We Could Only Talk” and his other albums are available on various online platforms–including iTunes.
Whew! This book may be fewer than 60 pages, and it’s an enjoyable read—but a dense one. By that I mean there’s lots to reflect on… And reflect some more. This book is a workshop!
Based on the title, I imagined a sassy, finger snapping read. That’s in here—along with research-based recommendations. I love when sass and humor meet academic research. I really relate to the tone of this book.
I also love the humor! Plenty of that in here, too…along with hope. That’s what I really, really like—all the steps are meant to get folks to hope.
My favorite parts include Chapter 4 and practical ways to get to acceptance—radical acceptance—and no longer blaming ourselves when someone we’re dating “ain’t actin’ right.”
Oh, and the necessity of forgiveness to get to a place of healing, and looking ahead to what we want life to look like after we’ve fully moved on.
There are 13 chapters total in the book, eight which outline the path leading to and including The Breakup Funeral™. Each chapter will ask you to do some thought work that involves accessing your deepest emotions surrounding the breakup (or breakups–plural– if it applies?) and any past influences that may impact your dating choices today. There are writing prompts that provide an outlet for all of that self-exploration and excavation.
Lenina Mortimer, the book’s author, recommends going through the eight steps in order because each step is builds up to the recovery culmination—The Breakup Funeral™.
Lookie here, seriously consider (then get) this book if you’re grappling with a recent breakup. Heck, you may want to check it out even if a relationship ended a while ago, but you’re still grappling with some residual grief. Even if your emotions and your mind ‘been known’ the person ain’t coming back, even if you don’t WANT them back—but you haven’t found it in you to start the path forward to thriving again… This book is also for you.
“I Ain’t Thinking About You” gets 5 out of 5 planets!
So…who likes to talk about death?
Put your hands up.
Yeah, I don’t know many people who love the topic, especially when they’re the subject.
But death’s a certainty. You won’t have a thing to worry about after you transition from this life, but your stuff isn’t going with you. What about the things you leave behind?
Well, that’s what attorney Suren G. Adams specializes in—helping folks get their final wishes in order before death ushers them to the exit—stage left.
“This is general information from an attorney and estate planner…For detailed information on your specific situation—please seek out the advice of a reputable estate planner,” Adams tells Planet Noun.
Let’s start with her pathway to helping folks wrangle up their loose ends BEFORE the end.
Even if you don’t possess a trove of dollars, jewels, land or vacation homes, Adams recommends that anyone age 18 or over have an estate plan in place.
Adams is based in Maryland, but she recommends the websites Wealth Counsel or Elder Counsel to help find reputable estate planners across the United States. Adams is a member of both, and recommends out of state callers to these sites.
“It usually means the person who is listed on that website is somebody that is getting very good education, because they put on really good continuing legal education courses, so that’s who I recommend to clients who call from another state that we don’t handle in terms of our licensing. We usually refer them to [those websites], because I can trust that the people on that website are, at least, getting good education, so they should be preparing a good estate plan,” Adams says.
Adams also refers clients to her book, “Leaving a Legacy Instead of a Mess.”
(As an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases.)
Well, that’s what Jason Thomas specializes in—making money work smarter for his clients to enable them to meet their financial goals.
Thomas is co-founder and president of The PILL Method, a financial counseling company that uses education and technology to show their clients ways to more astutely use their dollars and cents to move toward their financial goals and debt freedom.
“It can begin with simply having a checking and a savings account,” He told Planet Noun. “It does not require you to go get [a] loan, it doesn’t require anything else. What we can basically really show you—how to make your money smarter.”
Thomas joined Planet Noun for a conversation from his home in Jamaica, that’s where he and his wife Carmen and two sons moved recently from the United States.
February is Black History Month in the United States…a time to focus on the contributions and achievements of African Americans not only in the past, but to hear stories of those who are still with us, still writing their stories. George O. Davis is such a person. Part of his work involves helping to expose museum visitors to the stories of others.
00:43—Davis’s Pathway to CAAM ==========
22:23—Rundown of the museum’s features and a few current exhibits. By the time this episode drops, a couple of those will be on their last days. Here is a link list that includes information on the artists mentioned in this episode and exhibit dates:
Have you ever spoken to someone at work and you knew there was something more intriguing to their story?
That’s what I started finding out after one co-worker and I got to talking and I found out she has a yoga business. After starting this podcast, I asked her to be on the show to talk about the benefits of yoga.
It’s a New Year and, no doubt, you might be reviewing resolutions to be fitter, healthier, and/or vowing for better self care this year.
What better way to do so than to get your yoga on?
I’ve done so sporadically through the years and quickly noticed I was one of a few faces that looked like mine among the student population. I definitely didn’t notice any black instructors.
But now I know one! Yes, only one. I’m certain there are more out there, but she’s the only one I know of.
Meet Stephanie Gaines-Bryant. She’s a news anchor at a 24-hour radio news station in Washington, D.C. She’s also owner and operator of Radio Yogi Health and Fitness in Bowie, Md.
Listen up to find out more!
• 01:30 — What Radio Yogi is all about • 02:38—Stephanie’s journey to meditation; then yoga practice and instruction • 16:41—Thoughts about Christians and yoga practice
Part 2 • 21:10—Stephanie’s advice on starting a new habit this new year—whether it’s yoga or something else.
Part 3 • 39:44—In addition to being on the radio and running her yoga business, Stephanie also runs a non-profit—Sisters for Fitness, and talks about the concerns that led her to start the organization. This segues into a discussion about mental illness in the African American and some Christian church communities. If Jesus can fix it, why can’t that fixin’ be accomplished via a therapist?